Goodbye and Goodluck and Thank You for the wake up call*

Since I know you cannot, I changed my number, so you will not hear from me anymore. I still work at MRAH, so please continue to seek your veterinary care for Maya elsewhere. I will make every attempt to avoid any place where I might see you, so you should be relieved now. As far as tailgate, the Benning's and my family rescind your welcome there permanently. So that is one more place you will not have to see me.

I was so thankful for your friendship and that we were able to reestablish a connection in July 2015, but I see that you are unable to be anything with me. Lovers or nothing are the only two options and neither work for you. Friendship no longer applies in the mixture. For this I am truly sorry.

Hurting me with your calm, carefully typed and worded text messages are unfair to me and are a manipulation tool you have deployed as long as I have known you to make yourself the normal, shiny person and me the bad, crazy one. If this is what you must to do to tell yourself that you are broken, unable to have a good relationship, etc., and live with the role(s) you played in the suffrage of us (and all your other failed relationships), then so be it.

Implying that my family is some how complicit in whatever is wrong with you, me, or the former us, is just sad. Talking about my mom and telling me I need to get over it is something you have no right to say. Telling me that Joe needs to stand up to me never is or was your right (business or place). Please leave my family out of whatever angst you feel towards me because they have done nothing but be kind towards you.

As far as me being negative, I do not need reminders or put downs. You are the only person who says things like that to me and I know its to make yourself feel better. Nothing else makes sense since you never really knew me. My anger/hurt/frustration, etc. towards you is because you bring out the ugly side of me. That does not make me an ugly person. This is why we are not and can never be together, of that you are correct.

If you had been through even a quarter of what I have been through just in the past 14 months, you would not have the strength to endure it. All of your issues started with your parents when you were a child, bled into our relationship at times, but ultimately made you the person you are-both the good parts and the bad parts. In the future, place blame where it lies and do not go around trying to bring others down with you. I know you well enough to see that this probably makes you laugh (because that is what you do when you are wrong and others are right), but the sad truth is, you are only hurting yourself in the end. In my case, I get better every day and move forwards towards a much better future. So you hurt me on a Sunday afternoon, but by Sunday night, I have put it where it belongs-behind me.

Whether your words were intended to push me away or true or lie somewhere on the cusp of both, I forgive you, but I cannot be with, be friends with, or talk to people whose purpose is to knock down my accomplishments by focusing on negativity that is beyond my control.

So I wish you peace, I hope you find and fix whatever ails you so you can be happy alone or with another person. I wish you continued success in your endeavors--relationships, children, a successful business, etc. and will not lower myself to wish anything less for you.

Have a good life Patrick, whatever has made you so unhappy and in need of therapy, I hope you figure it out and I hope that you can heal, but please remember going forward to place your blame on those in which it lies, including yourself, or you will never change.

Dara